Diana Banana Pancakes

September 6, 2006

Ian’s first day of Kindergarten and weekend observations….

Filed under: Uncategorized — dianabananapancakes @ 9:16 am

Ian’s first day of kindergarten was yesterday, Tuesday. He was fine in the beginning, he was excited, I took his pic as we were heading into the car, then in front of the school sign, then in the cafeteria. Well, they had to grab their own milk and such, and he grabbed a chocolate milk, apparently he wasn’t SUPPOSED TO, but no one told us, so this old woman worker came up to ME and said “he isn’t supposed to have chocolate milk, only white milk” and I said “I’m sorry, we didn’t know” and then she grabbed his milk off his tray and said the same thing to him…of course THIS is when the tears started! I was a bit irritated with this woman now, she not only yelled at me, but she yelled at Ian, and I do mean yelled, cause when he was done eating and took his tray to be dumped, she’s the woman that you give the trays to, and she then was all smiles and said in a much sweeter, nicer tone “see you at lunch, you can have your chocolate milk at lunch time ok?” But, poor Ian was trying not to cry. He was doing so good till she scolded him for something he didn’t know he was doing wrong, then we sat at the table, someone we knew came by so I asked him to take our picture, and then Ian started eating and then he asked “when are you going to leave?” and I said “whenever you want me to.” and then he started to tear up again, first he said he wanted me to leave, so I started gathering my purse and camera, and then he looked at me with those big teary eyes and said he didn’t want me to leave yet, and then he started crying, poor guy. So, I stayed, he ate only a few bites of cereal, I guess with his nervous first day he wasn’t very hungry, so after breakfast we headed to his classroom where we found his locker to put his backpack in, and then I told him I was going to go and he gave me a hug and I told him to have a great day at kindergarten, and then he went into his room. He told me later after I picked him up from the afterschool daycare that he cried only once a little bit after I left cause he missed me. Awwww! But, he came home with a note from the teacher saying he had a super first day and was very eager to answer questions, and he was excited to tell me that he had a “fantastic first day at kindergarten”. Here are some pics:


He wants to go back today (Wednesday), so that’s a GOOD thing. πŸ™‚

Well, I had an interesting conversation with Bill, my friend who I dated for a little over a month. See, apparently I have this issue with not being able to relax around someone…I mean, I do, but some people I just take a little more time to trust and completely relax. With Jim I panicked in the beginning, but now that we’ve been friends for 2 years I’m completely relaxed around him. Same with Bill. I was talking to one of my female friends a little while back, too, after the Country Boy drama, and she told me something that really didn’t sink in until Bill told me the EXACT SAME THING….this is our IM: it starts off with me talking about Flatwoods cause I hadn’t heard from him to have plans on WHERE to meet at this point friday night, and we were supposed to meet up after I got off work on Saturday….I’m cutting and pasting the pertinent stuff…

baboupuff (9:45:30 PM): but, then today I asked if we were still on
for tonight, I guess you could say I bugged him about it, been stood up
way to freaking many times in the last 8 months
cluelessme1973 (9:46:05 PM): how many times did you ask?
baboupuff (9:46:14 PM): and he told me to ease up, that he thinks I’m
pretty and sexy and funny and we’re going to dinner and a movie
tomorrow and we;’re gonna work on getting to know each other and if he can’t
make it he’ll call
baboupuff (9:46:22 PM): but never mentioned about what time we’ll
meet and shit
baboupuff (9:46:34 PM): once a day since Tuesday?
baboupuff (9:46:43 PM): asking if we’re still on for Saturday
cluelessme1973 (9:46:53 PM): sweetie, you can’t do that
baboupuff (9:46:57 PM): i know
baboupuff (9:47:02 PM): i have issues
cluelessme1973 (9:47:04 PM): lol
baboupuff (9:47:13 PM): I seriously do. kinda all goes back to that
trust thing
cluelessme1973 (9:47:20 PM): I know
baboupuff (9:48:37 PM): so, yeah, I have some issues
cluelessme1973 (9:48:44 PM): we all do, Diana
cluelessme1973 (9:48:56 PM): it doesn’t mean you’re crazy or
baboupuff (9:49:09 PM): well, I can’t keep a good guy around
cluelessme1973 (9:49:30 PM): it just might change soon enough
cluelessme1973 (9:49:37 PM): dont get all sad on me

***{{right here I started looking sad I guess, web cam was on.))***

baboupuff (9:49:46 PM): I dont have much free time anymore, I don’t
want to waste it being stood up again
cluelessme1973 (9:52:48 PM): no one likes to be stood up
cluelessme1973 (9:52:59 PM): and it’s happened to all of us
baboupuff (9:53:12 PM): well, too many times in 7+ months
baboupuff (9:53:17 PM): and I even count the **country boy** thing as being stood
cluelessme1973 (9:53:20 PM): yep…you’r eright
cluelessme1973 (9:53:33 PM): you’ve had some seriously shitty luck
cluelessme1973 (9:53:42 PM): we both have
baboupuff (9:53:47 PM): yeah, I know it could be WORSE, but it does
NOTHING for my bruised ego
cluelessme1973 (9:54:10 PM): no, I’m saying that you have every right
to be sad/pissed about it
cluelessme1973 (9:55:19 PM): I’m not saying my stuff is worse than
yours, but it still sucks
baboupuff (9:55:23 PM): it does
cluelessme1973 (9:55:32 PM): it’s a bad time, Diana
baboupuff (9:55:32 PM): but, in my situation, it seems to be my fault
cluelessme1973 (9:55:34 PM): you’ll be ok
cluelessme1973 (9:55:43 PM): now your cam on the other hand…will
always suck
baboupuff (9:55:49 PM): lol
cluelessme1973 (9:56:23 PM): it’s ok if you want to cry for a
few…you’ve earned it
baboupuff (9:56:33 PM): lol
cluelessme1973 (9:56:34 PM): don’t blame you one bit
baboupuff (9:56:37 PM): i dont want to cry
baboupuff (9:56:45 PM): just sometimes I dont know what the hell I’m
doing wrong
cluelessme1973 (9:57:12 PM): you want my opinion?
baboupuff (9:57:14 PM): yes
baboupuff (9:57:21 PM): and I probably know what yu’re gonna say
cluelessme1973 (9:57:23 PM): brutal truth?
baboupuff (9:57:28 PM): sure
cluelessme1973 (9:57:39 PM): I really really like you…did from the
cluelessme1973 (9:57:53 PM): but the constant worrying thing put me
cluelessme1973 (9:58:10 PM): I sometimes regret ending things between
us, Diana
cluelessme1973 (9:58:23 PM): because I kind of understand it more now
baboupuff (9:58:31 PM): yeah, but its drama
baboupuff (9:58:34 PM): no one wants drama
cluelessme1973 (9:58:35 PM): exactly
cluelessme1973 (9:58:46 PM): don’t get me wrong
cluelessme1973 (9:58:56 PM): listen up, lady
cluelessme1973 (9:59:09 PM): you’re a great girl
cluelessme1973 (9:59:19 PM): diana
cluelessme1973 (9:59:30 PM): sorry for upsetting you
baboupuff (9:59:37 PM): you didnt
cluelessme1973 (9:59:46 PM): I sure didn’t help, did I
baboupuff (9:59:51 PM): i already know i chase guys away
cluelessme1973 (10:00:11 PM): well…you must not be very good at it
cluelessme1973 (10:00:19 PM): I’m still bugging you arent i?
baboupuff (10:00:31 PM): but I guess I wish it would balance out, the
other things that I DON’T do…like I don’t lie, I don’t cheat, I dont
get nosy or jealous
baboupuff (10:01:12 PM): I do too good of a job of it, cause I have
lots of guy friends….and guess who all my guy friends are?
ex-boyfriends or guys I’ve gone on a date or two with
cluelessme1973 (10:01:45 PM): I know that I should have been more
patient with you
cluelessme1973 (10:01:46 PM): ok
cluelessme1973 (10:01:48 PM): I admit it
cluelessme1973 (10:02:25 PM): after dealing with all of these ex’s,my
crazy meter was way too sensitive
baboupuff (10:02:41 PM): for me, it just takes me a long time to
trust someone to the point where I feel secure enough not to worry
cluelessme1973 (10:02:55 PM): I think I understand

cluelessme1973 (10:15:16 PM): just so you know….
baboupuff (10:15:20 PM): yes
cluelessme1973 (10:15:47 PM): the truth is that if you could have
somehow lerned to say fuck it and just had fun being goofy
cluelessme1973 (10:16:00 PM): then I probably never would have ended
things between us
cluelessme1973 (10:16:11 PM): and I’d probably want to try again if
you could do it now
cluelessme1973 (10:16:23 PM): I’m not saying any of this in a shitty
cluelessme1973 (10:16:35 PM): just true friend advice with no bull
cluelessme1973 (10:16:43 PM): you are a great girl
cluelessme1973 (10:16:47 PM): and you are pretty
cluelessme1973 (10:16:50 PM): and all of that
cluelessme1973 (10:17:00 PM): now you’re black again
cluelessme1973 (10:17:01 PM): lol
baboupuff (10:17:07 PM): with a shitty web cam, I saw it cut out that
cluelessme1973 (10:17:12 PM): lol
cluelessme1973 (10:17:46 PM): I’m trying to help, not hurt
baboupuff (10:17:50 PM): i know
cluelessme1973 (10:17:50 PM): promise
baboupuff (10:17:56 PM): it does hurt
cluelessme1973 (10:18:03 PM): I’m sorry
baboupuff (10:18:03 PM): cause I don’t do it on purpose
cluelessme1973 (10:18:29 PM): I nkow
baboupuff (10:18:32 PM): just past experiences, and seems each time
it happens
baboupuff (10:18:54 PM): and when I DONT freak out
baboupuff (10:19:07 PM): it catches me off guard and things end, so
then I worry more again the next time
cluelessme1973 (10:19:13 PM): so come on down to TN and practice on
me for a couple of days
cluelessme1973 (10:19:14 PM): lol
baboupuff (10:19:33 PM): lol
cluelessme1973 (10:19:48 PM): I don’t mean to hurt you
baboupuff (10:19:53 PM): I know
baboupuff (10:19:58 PM): its more that “the truth hurts” shit
cluelessme1973 (10:20:06 PM): I know
baboupuff (10:20:11 PM): and I know I’m the one that chases the guy
away in most cases
baboupuff (10:20:25 PM): and when I’m aware I’m doing it, I
stop….but, then I think things are going good, and it catches me off guard
cluelessme1973 (10:20:31 PM): I don’t know about tha…I’m only
talking about us
cluelessme1973 (10:20:42 PM): what happened between you and I
cluelessme1973 (10:21:03 PM): don’t be sad
cluelessme1973 (10:21:20 PM): you know what’s going on, so in a way
you’re lucky
cluelessme1973 (10:21:29 PM): I have NO IDEA what I’m doing wrong
cluelessme1973 (10:21:30 PM): lol
baboupuff (10:21:50 PM): you just know what you won’t put up with
cluelessme1973 (10:22:14 PM): yeah, but lets face it….I’ve never
exactly been a ladies man
baboupuff (10:22:30 PM): I liked ya
baboupuff (10:22:43 PM): and Id idn’t realize with you that I was
being this way
cluelessme1973 (10:23:05 PM): it just seemed like you could never let
go enough to be yourself
baboupuff (10:23:09 PM): i thought things were going good
cluelessme1973 (10:23:17 PM): and I couldn’t decide what I had to
cluelessme1973 (10:24:48 PM): then there was graduation and finding a
job and moving
baboupuff (10:24:56 PM): yeah
cluelessme1973 (10:25:14 PM): it was all big stuff and I couldn’t
…you get the picture
baboupuff (10:25:21 PM): yeah
cluelessme1973 (10:25:28 PM): don’t be so sad….
cluelessme1973 (10:25:41 PM): who knows…maybe you and I can give it
another try one of these days
cluelessme1973 (10:25:51 PM): I have considered it you know
baboupuff (10:25:56 PM): I didn’t know that
cluelessme1973 (10:26:03 PM): of course I have
cluelessme1973 (10:26:27 PM): I’m surprised that you’re surprised
baboupuff (10:26:33 PM): of course I am
cluelessme1973 (10:27:11 PM): I just have to try and figure out how
to find a career before I can even try to make decisions about anything
baboupuff (10:27:25 PM): i understand that
cluelessme1973 (10:28:26 PM): I’ll say it again….
cluelessme1973 (10:28:33 PM): you’re a good girl, Diana
cluelessme1973 (10:28:39 PM): better than you let yourself believe
cluelessme1973 (10:28:47 PM): that’s exactly the problem
cluelessme1973 (10:28:52 PM): but you’ll get there eventually
baboupuff (10:29:21 PM): I have this friend, she had I have had very
serious heart to hearts, talking about guys from our past, broken
relationships, and we tell each other details…and I’m gonna tell you what
she told me
baboupuff (10:30:20 PM): well, she said this about me: “Diana, you’re
a good person, and more than one guy you’ve dated in your past said so,
and they still talk to you, are still in your life as your friend, that
shows you that they are telling the truth”

**{{here I ramble on what she said about my male friends who dated me and are still in my life as friends, ex’s who have come around from my past to say that I’m a good person, even Country Boy, etc))**

baboupuff (10:33:44 PM): so, she brings all this up and says that
everyone is telling me I’m a good person, not just pretty and sexy, but
all 3, but I don’t believe it
cluelessme1973 (10:34:47 PM): Like I said earlier…if you would have
just relaxed and had fun and been yourself…there you go
baboupuff (10:34:53 PM): BUT, I know I’m a good person as far as I
know I have a good heart, and I know I’m not a liar or a cheater or a
gold digger, and I know I’d do anything for someone in my life, I know I
love to laugh and joke around….I DO KNOW these things about me
baboupuff (10:35:22 PM): but I think no one else REALLY knows it
until they become my friend
cluelessme1973 (10:35:35 PM): exactly
baboupuff (10:35:50 PM): and SHE said “that’s because once you are
just friends, the pressure is off for you and you can finally relax and
be yourself completely, not just sometimes around them.”
cluelessme1973 (10:36:01 PM): once the pressure is off, then
cluelessme1973 (10:36:13 PM): I had typed that befor eyou sent it
baboupuff (10:36:31 PM): that’s what she said about me
cluelessme1973 (10:36:37 PM): she’s right
cluelessme1973 (10:37:00 PM): you ARE a good person, but there’s more
going for you than that
cluelessme1973 (10:37:08 PM): You’re also attractive
cluelessme1973 (10:37:15 PM): You’re also smarter than you nkow
cluelessme1973 (10:37:30 PM): It’s time for you to put it all into
perspective, Diana
cluelessme1973 (10:37:44 PM): it doens’t matter how great you are if
you don’t know it
cluelessme1973 (10:37:59 PM): it’s the same as the egotistical people
cluelessme1973 (10:38:27 PM): it doesn’t matter what good features
they have because it’s so damned annoying being around their egos
cluelessme1973 (10:38:45 PM): you’re just the opposite

cluelessme1973 (10:42:42 PM): I’m just saying that if you would have
relaxed and been yourself wiht me, then I never would have ended things
cluelessme1973 (10:43:10 PM): you know
cluelessme1973 (10:43:26 PM): it’s very rare to be able to get such
candid advice from an ex like this
baboupuff (10:43:36 PM): i know
cluelessme1973 (10:44:18 PM): well, so you know, I’m just trying to
help …and Ihope you’re listening
cluelessme1973 (10:44:56 PM): all this mushy feelings crap
cluelessme1973 (10:45:04 PM): jk
cluelessme1973 (10:45:59 PM): I’m sure not saying that I’m perfect or
anyting, so feel free to give me some brutal truths if you’d like
cluelessme1973 (10:47:00 PM): hell, at least people want you…wht
are you complaining about?

So, that was long and I suppose I’ll end it here! πŸ™‚ I hope everyone had a great Labor Day weekend. πŸ™‚

Happy Hump Day!



  1. Diana,
    I know you don’t know me in RL but I think before you consider going back out with this individual you should really ask some of your friends for their opinon on him. You will have to let people know what has transpired between the two of you and please include this IM conversation you had with him. Hell. Re-read the IM convo yourself from an outside perspective. replacing his and your names with two other people and see what you think. In my opinon,(I know you didn’t ask and might not care)but………in my opinon,(yes, I’m still going to say it) I think you should definatly not go on any more dates whatsoever with this cluelessme1973 as there seems to be something fundementaly wrong with him. It’s a feeling I have gained simply from reading his words and hearing about him and his actions. I know we do not know each other in RL and only a little in cyber land but I don’t want to see you hurt or mistreated/used. If you need a guy or anyone to talk to that thinks your a good person but has no romantic intrests in you because he is firmly committed to someone else already and happy, I am available to talk. Think about it.if you are dateing an ax murderer or even a player and you ask said ax murderer/player if they are indeed an axmurderer/player because you don’t want to be used hurt, stood up, whatever………..do you REALLY think they are going to tell you the truth? Or do you think they will hide or bend it? Maybe they will give you a form of the truth so they can say” I never lied”. But you know what? They will have. Think about this. If you were a player and wanted to get a girl you would deny being a player or say you’ve changed or some other bs to reach your objective. You wouldn’t tell the person who is afraid of being played/used/killed/whatever what your true intentions were/are or you wouldn’t be a very good player/killer/ect. I hope I haven’t offended you with this. I loved th pictures and the story of your son’s 1st day; it brought back a lot of memories of my son’s 1st day in kindergarten,(he’s 8 and in 3rd now). peace~art

    Comment by art — September 6, 2006 @ 2:09 pm | Reply

  2. Hi. I don’t know you at all… but I am also a single mom with a full-time job except have two kids. Anyway, please don’t take this wrong… but it seems to me that you are almost obsessing about finding a guy. I know it is lonely because I am right there with you. I have decided, though, that I need to be happy with myself before I am ready to be with someone else. I think I am there… but I am not going “looking” for someone because I know eventually that right person will come along.

    It seems that you are almost depressed if you aren’t with a guy every weekend… whether it be a friend or a date.

    Maybe just relax and just enjoy your life for what it is and the right guy will come along. If not for a while, you have a beautiful son who loves you more than anything in the world. You are luckier than many, many people…

    I hope you don’t think I am being harsh or mean because I can only say this because I have been there too.

    I hope things work out for you and I really like your blog!

    Comment by Jen — September 7, 2006 @ 10:30 pm | Reply

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